Jitters

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Does everybody who leave Singapore to go overseas for a long period of time all feel like this? Be it for studies, work or even migration to another country, do they all feel the same as I do right now? To be honest, as the days draw nearer, I can't, and don't feel excited anymore. My initial excitement at being able to go overseas again is now being replaced more by worry, trepidation and even homesickness. Yes homesickness even when I haven't even left yet. ;X

I told myself I had to at least get away and experience what life away from Singapore is like. I know that I will not have the chance anymore once I start working and that I will sorely regret it for the rest of my life if I don't go ahead with my plan.

I have never left my parents' side for more than 2 weeks at a stretch. Living without them by my side will really need some time getting used to. If I were to go to HK, I think I wouldn't really be feeling this way 'cos I know the language, I have relatives there, and perhaps 'cos after all, the environment is still "Chinese", which is the environment I have grown up in, the culture I've grown so accustomed to.

On top of that, I am very afraid that I won't be able to get along well with A. Being friends is one thing. But being stuck together for 4 months with another person is another scary thought. You get to see all their flaws, and probably what they are is different from what I thought they were. I must say that I don't think I have a very good temper. The reason why not many people (save for my family members) have seldom seen me lose my temper is because I know how to keep it in check very well. But I hate it when things don't get done quickly. I need to learn to be more patient, but time is running out and the worse thing is we haven't even settled on finding our accommodation.

Update: Guess what? A just told me that the host got back to her and said that she let the room out to another person. So that means we're without accommodation. -.-'''

I've been praying for a smooth journey for this trip, praying that there won't be any major hiccups, praying that I will come back to SG a better person. Now, I will need to pray that I will get along with A well. It will be damn awkward if we are living together and yet not on talking terms. And I shall pray that we can find our accommodation before we reach there or on the day we reach there.

Staying on the streets in a foreign country is damn scary please.

God, please save us all. T_T

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